EXCUSE ME, I AM A DIVA BUT DESPERATE

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Decoding the women in the Delhi Metro’s Ladies Coach.

This piece has been triggered by an observation made by a male colleague of mine who said that women in the Delhi Metro tend to cling to each other far more than men. Although at that point of time, I vehemently denied it; on retrospection I realized it was absolutely true!

Picture this, any bench inside the Delhi metro can seat up to seven people. But the moment an empty Metro enters the platform; a mob of womankind darts ahead to wiggle and wag, twist and turn, almost throwing you into the ‘mind the gap’ territory that they keep warning you about. In the end, at least nine of them fit into one single bench. This only means that each of the girls sitting on the bench has one butt-cheek up in the air and is in far worse shape than the ones standing. It also means that the girls have a much lower size assessment of their behinds. Come on girls, your asses are not as small as you think. I mean those demarcations on the benches are there for a reason.

If for some reason, one of them doesn’t get a seat, they simply stand hovering over you, silently willing you to shrink in size. Or simply glaring and staring till you get off at your metro station. Some of them will demand outright “thoda adjust kar lo”, which basically means you have to adjust her bum, her laptop bag, her lunch bag as well as some shopping bags. Few minutes into the journey, when one of your butt has already been mid-air for some time, your shoulder has got used to stooping over your bag simply because there isn’t enough space to adjust both the shoulders, your lunch bag been kicked around some and you have overheard the choicest Honey Singh songs on your neighbour’s phone, begins the game of bhutta eating. No matter what, there will be one woman who is eating bhutta in the Delhi Metro while you are busy trying to breathe and banging you on your face.

Now the question arises, why is there such a huge overwhelming mind-boggling passion to sit down? Most of these women are either going to or coming from their office or home or college. At any of the given places, they were obviously already sitting for few hours at a stretch. Then why this huge urge to sit down again?

It also makes me think, what actually happens when you are standing. If it is a very crowded metro, you are clearly pushed and pulled about, and you obviously can’t sit. But what if it is not that crowded? What is the desperation then to sit down? I mean do you get an instant heart attack or something like a meteor comes and strikes you down if are standing?

Often these women might be the ones who carry salads in their tiffin dabbas and hit the gym regularly. Haven’t you people heard that by simply standing, you can burn so much of calories?

There is this other problem that women in the metro have. They very conveniently tend to forget that they have elbows. I, hereby, declare that we womenfolk do have a necessary bendable part residing in the middle of our hands, known as, and referred to hereinafter as ‘elbows’.

When there is just a centimeter of space between you and the girl next to you, you can’t fold your elbows. Not to watsapp, not to fiddle with your bag, definitely not to stuff chips in your mouth and not even to remove that errant strand of hair. Your elbows need to be ram rod straight, under any circumstance in a crowded metro.

On second thoughts, add your ass to that list as well. Bending down to pick up your bag every now and then, unmindful of where your ass is, is simply unacceptable.

10 DELHI MUGHAL ARCHITECTURAL WONDERS

While it is a known fact that Delhi owes much of its cultural glory and grandeur to the Mughals, not many know much about Mughal Architecture. In fact, one out of every four people residing in Delhi  hasn't even visited any of these architectural marvels.

The arrival of the Mughals was a turning point in Indian history, more so in its architecture. Greatly influenced by the Persian styles, all the early Mughal rulers constructed excellent mausoleums, mosques, forts, gardens and cities. The Mughal buildings show a uniform pattern both in structure and character. The main characteristic features of Mughal architecture are its bulbous domes, slender minarets with cupolas at four corners, large halls, lattice work, massive vaulted gateways and delicate ornamentation.

The beginning of the Mughal era under Babar, followed by  Humayun doesn't have much architectural significance for Delhi. Akbar on the other hand, was spiritually inclined and with him began a flourishing era of Mughal architecture. His son Jahangir, an aesthete contributed to this era with many tombs built in the glory of nobility who had been at court since his father’s times. The chief amongst his works was refurbishing and restoring the tomb of the venerated Sheikh Nizamuddin Auliya. 

Shah Jahan needs no introduction to the architectural world. While his masterpiece Taj Mahal is located in Agra, his magic touched Delhi also in form of the city of Shahjahanabad, built along the banks of the Yamuna in Delhi. Architecture of Delhi during his era was done at a very idyllic pace, as if the entire city was in love with the process of building itself. His son, Auranzeb on the other hand,  proved to be a disappointment in the annals of Mughal architecture. Busy dealing with political strife, whatever little he contributed was within the walled city of Shahjahanabad itself. Gradually, as the Mughal Dynasty declined and the British rose to power, the rulers to seemed to have less and less resources in their hand to devote much to architecture.

Mention must however; be made of the women in the Mughal Empire who despite being behind the purdah, yielded immense wealth and power to contribute radiant architectural wonders. The first amongst them is Haji Begum, wife of Mughal emperor Humayun who built the Humayun’s tomb. Again, Nur Jahan was known as a great patron of architecture and built many beautiful palaces, gardens and mosques. Jahangir’s daughter Princess Jahanara participated in major architectural projects in the new Mughal capital, Shahjahanabad. She was the patron of at least five important buildings there. The pulse of Shahjahanabad - the bazaar of Chandni Chowk (“moonlight square”) - was designed by Jahanara.

While it might not be possible for everyone to devote time to each and every architectural marvel of the Mughal era, the best of it can’t be resisted. Here’s a list of ten Delhi Mughal monuments you have to  make time for.

  

Humayun’s Tomb

Right up on this list is Humayun’s Tomb, built as mentioned before by Haji Begum in memory of her loving husband, Humayun. Listed in UNESCO’s World Heritage sites, it is the first garden tomb to be built in the Indian subcontinent. This original masterpiece made in red sandstone is known to be the inspiration for Taj Mahal. Ironically, neither this monument nor the love story associated with it is not as popular as the one it inspired.  

Red Fort

If you are history junkie, there’s no way you can miss out on this one. Though not as well maintained as the Agra Fort, this fortified palace built by Shah Jahan brings alive the stateliness of the Mughal court. Diwani - i - Aam and Diwani - i - Khas, Rang Mahal, Khas Mahal, Hamam, Delhi Gate, Lahori Gate, Moti Masjid, Naubat Khana, Hira Mahal, Shahi Burj are some of its memorable structures. It combines the architecture of Islamic era with that of Persian, Timurid and Hindu design. Spend some time here imagining that you are a Mughal royalty.

Purana Quila

Built on the site of the most ancient of Delhi’s city Indraprastha, the Purana Quila as the name suggests stands stoically against the vagaries of time and nature. This can be an ideal place to spend a winter afternoon, basking in the sun and figuring the three huge gateways out. Once you are done with admiring Humayun’s ambitious plan for his city Dinpannah, there’s also a moat surrounding the fort for boating. 

Jama Masjid

With a courtyard capable of holding 25000 devotees and innumerable pigeons, this ancient masjid brings you one step closer to divinity. Commissioned by Shah Jahan, the mosque was a result of the hard work of about 6000 workers, over a period of 6 years. Visit the place with your socks on, as the red sandstone flooring of the mosque can be very hot to your bare feet.

Safdarjung Tomb

The last flicker of the Mughal architecture can be seen in this monumental tomb garden. This enclosed tomb was built in the memory of Safdarjung, the minister of Avadh during the reign of Muhammad Shah. While it bears resemblance to the Humayun’s Tomb, it is of a much lesser stature. Some interesting structures of this monument are Jangli Mahal, Badshah Pasand, Moti Mahal, etc.

Chandni Chowk

Chandni Chowk or the moonlight market was commissioned by Shah Jahan and designed by princess Jahanara. Originally criss crossed by canals, this densely populated area still remains one of India’s largest wholesale markets. Visit this place to check out the old havelis of Ghalib, Begum Samru and Chunnamal. Binge at places running since Mughal era like Ghantewala Halwai and shop anything and everything.

Zafar Mahal

The last monument constructed by the Mughals is the Zafar Mahal. Situated in the heart of Mehrauli, to the western gate of the dargah of Khawaja Bakhtiyar Kaki, this Mahal was named by Emperor Akbar II after his son Bahadur Shah Zafar. Much of this summer palace is today in ruins. However, one can still see glimpses of the gone era in its white marble Moti Majid.

Fatehpuri Masjid

A 17^th century mosque built by Fatehpuri Begum, one of Shah Jahan’s wives this mosque is located in  Chandni Chowk. Built with red sandstone, the mosque has a prayer hall and a fluted dome on top. It is flanked by both single and double storeyed apartments.

Tomb of Atgah Khan

This quaint little tomb was built for a noble man in Akbar’s court, who was murdered by a rival. Located in Hazrat Nizamuddin Basti, this 16^th century monument remains a secret to many. Sadly, not much has been done to maintain its beauty. Visit it before its gone.

Khan – i – Khana’s Tomb

Abdul Rahim Khan - i - Khana, was the son of Bairam Khan and one of Navratnas of Akbar’s courts. Situated in Nizamuddin, this tomb was meant for his wife but eventually he himself was buried here. A paved lane lined by trees leads to this weathered tomb highlighted by a dome and chattris. Ironically, the marble used for this monument was stripped of the Safdarjung tomb later on. 

PARANTHE WALI DRIVE

When you have a name like Ahuja No.1, do we need to say more? This dhaba can easily be spotted on your left when you reach Murthal, on Delhi Karnal Highway. The journey itself, could prove to be one of the fun ways to spend a day if you want to go for a long drive and end it with some good food.

The moment you enter Murthal, a number of Dhaba’s welcome you. There’s Gulshan’s Dhaba, Pehelwan’s Dhaba, Jhilmil, Sukhdev apart from the one I am talking about here. We chose Ahuja No.1 because the crowd seemed better here. They have a separate sitting area for the families too.

Had it been located in Delhi, Ahuja No. 1’s paranthes would definitely given the Paranthe Wali Gali a run for its money. Firstly, because unlike the paranthas served at Paranthe Wali Gali none of the paranthas are deep fried. They are all made in the tandoor.

There is a whole list of paranthas to choose from, some of which are listed below –

Aloo Parantha – The classic mashed potato stuffed parantha sprinkled with red chilli powder.

Aloo Piyaaj Parantha – Same as above except that you will bite into crunchy pieces of onion every now and then.

Pudina Parantha – This is a type of lachha parantha peppered with mint. It looks quite different from the other parathas and is best savoured when hot.

Gobi Parantha – Cauliflower chopped into tiny bits and stuffed inside a usual parantha. Tastes quite nice and different.

Mooli Parantha – This is the only form in which I find radishes tolerable and quite tasty actually.

All the paranthas are served with panchranga pickle, sirce wala pyaaj, and huge dollops of white cow butter which is amazingly yum. Team it with Dal Fry or Dal Makhani and your day is made. Curd could also be a god option.

It is best not to think of calories that day. Have your fill and then head out for a stroll in the nearby fields. You can always hit the gym later.

Quite funnily these dhabas have started serving noodles and burgers too. I just hope people stop demanding noodles at such places and let authentic food survive.

SORRY, NO SNAKES AND LIZARDS FOR DINNER

Among other things, people do have the strangest of questions on their mind when it comes to food from north east (of India, just in case you got confused with the north east of China, Africa or the antipodes). In fact, I have often replied the polite enquiries of my colleagues of what I was cooking for dinner with a cold glare. I was bored of explaining time and again that Assamese food also  consisted of dal chawal, arguably the most common Indian meal.

But when I pondered over this topic deeper, I realised this lack of information was actually a lack of the availability of the food itself in other parts of the country. Rosang Café is an exception in this regard. For all those who have no clue what food from north east is like, do head to Rosang Cafe. Located near Upahar Cinema in Green Park, it brings the finest food of the seven north eastern states.

Jokes apart, despite being an Assamese, I myself have limited knowledge about the north eastern cuisines. I am desperately trying to rectify this problem by visiting Rosang frequently. While I would highly recommend the place to everyone, here are a few things to keep in mind before trying out food from north east.

#1. North eastern food is light on your taste buds and tummy. Not excited? Then try the piping hot dry fish chutney!

#2. Some of the dishes may have strong aromas, often not so pleasant if you aren't used to it. Come prepared.

#3. All the dishes are extremely healthy. Do tell your trainer about it.

#4. It’s not only about noodles and momos. What were you expecting a chocolate momo or a paneer one?

#5. Do not expect it to be spicy and oily. But count on it to be flavoursome.

#6. For God's sake don't come and ask for a roti or naan. Didn't you know the best thing on earth is rice?

#7. You think it will be like Chinese and Thai. You couldn't be more wrong. The spices, herbs and process of preparing the dishes are all different.

#8. Vegetarians are welcome too. We don’t sit at the slaughterhouse 24 x 7.

#9. The curries won’t look red; turmeric is not a favourite here. Did you say you already knew it?

#10. Taste a new vegetable like kol posola (banana stem). You’ll soon realise vegetables go beyond cauliflowers and peas.

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While trying food from north east, please do remember that they are seven states not one. This is another problem I want to deal with it. But let’s just stick to the food here. Being neighbouring states the cuisines of the north eastern states do have similarities, however, they are as varied as the seven states and the people living in them are. Thankfully, Rosang Café picks some of the best dishes from the seven states.

Go with an open mind. Do try the spicy Dry Fish Chutney, Aksa Meh a delicious chicken curry, Fried Fish in Burmese paste and Dohneiihong, a Meghalayan pork dish cooked in black seasame seeds. Yes, the names are difficult. But admit it they can’t be more difficult than that of the Thai, Mexican or French dishes.

Enjoy the hospitality of the super friendly owner, Mary. And hopefully you’ll get to understand that part of the country slightly better.

P.S. These pictures have been taken on a mobile phone by a not so great photographer. The food actually looks much better than this.

WHAT DELHI HIDES IN IT'S HEART

Ever fascinated with ancient monuments, when I heard about this place I was very excited. I immediately googled about it and read up whatever was available. Strangely, even though it is in the heart of the city, not many people know about Ugrasen or Agrasen Ki Baoli.

Again, there is no general consensus as to who built this historical stepwell. The popular belief however, holds that it was built by the Raja Agrasen of the agarwal community in the pre Lodhi period to preserve water.

In December 2012, I had visited another step well, Anangtal Baoli, located in Mehrauli. It had been a memorable trip with two of my friends. Something I had wanted to repeat soon but hadn't got the chance.

Baavris at Baoli

Then one fine day, me and a friend, who is equally gung ho about quaint places, eagerly set off for the Ugrasen Ki Baoli. The place is located inside a tiny lane called Hailey lane on Hailey Road in CP. The fact that it can be easily reached by an auto or by the metro made us too happy. For your information, the closest metro station is Barakhamba or Rajiv Chowk.

Quite interestingly, the road that leads to the Baoli has graffiti art all over. It’s a stark contrast to what awaits a visitor inside. The entrance to the Baoli is very unassuming and low key, with a very small courtyard leading in. See more pictures of the Baoli here.

When we entered the place, we met the usual crowd that greets you at all Delhi Heritage sites. College kids, photographers, love birds and a few elderly people who visit the place to crib about the rest of the visitors.

The moment we reached the Baoli, I went ahead on my snap happy spree and my friend became my muse for the day. The light however, was not very favourable. The deeper we went into the well, the worse the pictures turned out.

Simplicity at its best

It is a relatively simple structure, consisting of a single flight of 103 steps that culminate in a now dry water tank. The stone walls of the well are stark yet beautiful, forming a 60 x 15 meter rectangle made up of a series of superimposed arcades.

As you go down the steps, the silence deepens. The air too becomes putrid with the smell of bat shit, making one wonder what we are doing to preserve such places. However, all is not lost. Unlike other places, this Baoli did have some caretakers who if nothing else saw to it that people don’t enter the restricted areas.

Walkways interrupt the walls at three levels, allowing the visitor to explore various alcoves and rooms. Today, the more hazardous of these rooms are secured with gates. One can easily see the craftsmanship and the intricate work on the ceiling of the dome. It’s a pity however, that most of it is in a poor condition.

Many years ago, this Baoli must have been a solace for people suffering because of the summer heat. There used to be water in the Baoli till as recently as 2001. Lovers threw coins to wish for something, boys threw pebbles and the birds alighted for cool dip.

As with all relics, the silence was all encompassing making it hard to believe that this place is so close to the commercial capital of Delhi. The only giveaway is the skyscraper which outlines the horizon seen from the Baoli.

While people have deserted this place to a great extent, the wise have taken abode. Every nook and cranny of the Baoli has been taken over by the pigeons. Now it is their world.

If you ever visit the Baoli, do look out for a mosque nearby. Unfortunately, I couldn’t make the time to visit this place. Instead, me and my friend preferred to walk down the Hailey Road which itself is quite a nice place for a walk.

A TRIP FOR THE TASTE BUDS

Those who have been thinking of visiting Karims in Old Delhi, there is another option to try out. Many of you might already be aware of it. The eaterie referred to here Al Jawahar. It is located in the same lane as Karims, opposite Jama Masjid and is much more pocket friendly.

I happened to be in Old Delhi last week and couldn't return without visiting Al Jawahar. I strongly recommend the vegetarians to stay away from the place. As the way to the restaurant is lined with not so appetizing sights of non veg food.

The restaurant has three floors, the 2nd floor of which has been marked for families. I and my friends decided to settle in the 2nd floor. They have all the regular Mughlai food from Chicken Jahangiri to Mutton Roganjosh from Sheermaal to Shami Kebabs.

Not much can be said about the ambience and the presentation. The crockery looked old and dirty, the paper napkins were of the poorest quality possible. However, the food more than compensated for the lack of everything else. We ordered Shami Kebabs, Chicken Qorma, Palak Gosht and Roomali Rotis. The portions were good. Ordering half plate makes sense as it allows you to try two dishes in the price of one full plate. They also served complimentary salad.